I See What You Meme

I think about Charlotte every single day. However, this time of year, I'm flooded with all kinds of memories as we commemorate the anniversary of her birth. This year feels like a bit of a milestone. Sixteen.  If cancer had not taken her life back in 2010, I have a feeling I would be planning a massive birthday celebration this year. 16 always feels like a landmark year in someone's life.  I have been thinking a great deal about the last birthday party we had for Charlotte in 2009. We didn't know it at the time, but we were halfway through her treatment journey. We had been through three major brain surgeries and a few rounds of inpatient chemotherapy. Treatments were not going well. In fact, right after her birthday, we would make the trip to Houston, Texas where we would settle in for about 10 weeks of proton beam radiation treatments and a new customized chemotherapy protocol. This was the unspoken "last chance option" to beat that aggressive brain tumor into ...

Yes. It's been a long time since I've blogged. Doesn't mean my mind hasn't been churning.  It's *Diagnosis Day*. The picture below was taken by Roger as they were waiting at the hospital for CAT scan results on January 20, 2009. I shared our story yesterday at a Synapse meeting, rather unexpectedly. A "teaser" from another member about the  Thumbs Up Ball 2018  and the pending anniversary of this date were both combining factors that helped me decide to share the story. This day in 2009 is forever etched in my brain. There are few details that I have forgotten. I remember Roger picking me up from a full morning of teaching at Romp n' Roll after he'd already spent hours with Charlotte at the pediatricia n and at St. Mary's for a CAT scan. I remember grabbing a quick lunch from the Drive-Thru of Chick-fil-A, but not really wanting to eat anything. (Not wanting to eat CFA? I know! Right?) I remember using my non-smart phone to call friends ...

If there's one thing I've learned on this parenting journey, it's that everyone travels through this experience looking through a lens that is tinted by their own experiences, the way they were raised by their own family, their education, and their personalities.  From the very beginning of parenthood...even before the child pops out of the womb...we, as parents, are bombarded with suggestions and recommendations. Get a doula. Get an epidural. Don't get an epidural. Don't ever co-sleep. Follow your child's lead. Don't feed them solids until they are six months old. Feed them solids early and they will sleep through the night sooner. Enroll them in classes to stimulate their brain. Let them be "free spirits" and explore and play.  In the words of the great Jimmy Buffett, "If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." It's with all this in mind that I reflect on one parenting perspective that is unique to those who have ch...

This post is not about politics. But it is about Election Day. This was quite a week. We voted. Candidates won. Candidates lost. We said goodbye to political ads for another year or so.  It was a lot to take in.   Charlotte: Election Day 2008 With all the events of the week, my thoughts continued to return to Charlotte.  I thought about how she always went with us to the polls.  Four years ago, she braved the lines and the rain to vote TWICE; once with me and once with her dad.  On election night, Charlotte had long since gone to sleep but Roger and I stayed up till after midnight, watching history unfold.  In the morning, we told her that Barack Obama was our new President.  She could recognize his face in magazines and on television and would say, "That's Barack Obama. He's our new president." Who could have guessed that barely two months from that date, as the President took the oath of office, we faced a whole new world that we never ex...

Well it's my birthday too!  Not quite, but soon! Okay, with apologies to the Beatles, my birthday is approaching. I am not telling you this because I want presents or lavish parties.  In fact, I would prefer to not make my birthday a big deal.  It's not a significant year and, quite frankly, I have plenty of physical reminders that I am getting older.    I do have a few wishes, though. If you would like to give something in honor of my birthday, please consider making a donation in my honor to Autism Speaks .  Our school is participating in the upcoming walk on September 29th and I would like your help and support.  Autism Speaks does a lot to help families managing the difficult diagnosis of an autism spectrum disorder with research, advocacy, and family support.  You can follow this link to make a donation. Take the $5 you would spend on a beer or a card for me and give it to them.  If you have even more money to burn , you c...